When I can't

http://benjaminwblog.com/2014/07/when-i-cant/

when I can't

the holy spirit ties my shoes

double knot, just so, snug

and my hair loose, arms out wide

whispers catch the cat of nine

the trees slap at my knees;

turning aside the burning nib

that pens in hateful words

onto my parched and parchment soul -

muse and music, wine and time

for lying by Elijah dining

on the gifts of ravens,

where the world is an empty

deserted place without any water

I am lifted on the wings of eagles

sipping holy water and unraveling

the spiritual knots so I might

wander heaven's pastures, bare of foot

On difficult days, more than other days, the second string steps up to play. I’m falling on useless legs like a world-cup stumbler, praying for a foul, a little grace from a biased referee. And when my knees break, shins crack, and I curl into a little helpless quaver on the thin green grass, the stretchers come to carry me into the wings for a rest. There is nothing wrong with the bench, nothing I couldn’t anticipate. Oh, and how those who wait want to run. How could you not, sitting on heaven’s shores, waiting for a little chance to soar?

To Err

Books to movies always grind my gears a bit. It always seems rushed. A book that takes about two hours to read, turned into a two hour movie (Ender's Game) is one crime after another as they rush past monumental aspects of the story.

I haven't had a bad day in weeks, but I think that, perhaps, today was one such. Not all of the day, certainly, just the motif of the day scraped incessantly, like sharp nails scratching at a rash until it bleeds. That makes it sound advertent. Sometimes such things are, and sometimes it's simple distraction, forgetting people are people. I know this; I've fallen into this same trap often. So why does something so expected stab at my heart, grind into my ears with the cruel screech of fingernails on chalkboards, the agonizing snap of splintering bones?

Because I'm only human and, more than that, the weakest of them all.